Lying to Your Attorney And Other Divorce Mistakes

Your actions during the divorce process, especially when emotionally charged, can significantly impact the outcome. As a divorce attorney, I’ve seen clients make mistakes that complicate their cases, increase costs, or even harm their legal standing.

Here are six key things to avoid while navigating the divorce process to ensure the best possible outcome.

1. Lying to Your Attorney

The only way I can defend you and present a case that will yield the best outcome is to know what I am up against. I’ve heard it all, and our conversations are generally protected by attorney-client privilege. It’s best to be upfront about what’s been going on in your marriage that has led you to divorce. Similarly, failing to disclose all assets and financial details is a serious mistake that can lead to legal penalties. Be honest and transparent to ensure a fair settlement.

2. Flooding Your Attorney with Emails

When going through a divorce, you’ll likely have many questions. Sending your attorney individual emails for every question can bog down communication and increase costs. Instead, consolidate your questions into a single email or list and send them once a week unless it’s an emergency.

Addressing multiple questions at once allows your attorney to respond more efficiently and helps keep your legal fees in check. This approach also ensures that you both remain organized and focused on the most important aspects of your case.

3. Ignoring Professional Advice

Your attorney, financial advisor, therapist, and other professionals are there to guide and support you. Ignoring their advice can lead to poor decisions that harm your case or prolong the process. For example, failing to follow financial advice might result in unfavorable asset division, while disregarding legal counsel could weaken your position in court.

To achieve the best outcome, trust the expertise of your team and follow their recommendations. Their guidance is rooted in experience and designed to protect your interests.

Divorce is undoubtedly one of the most challenging times in a person’s life, but the way you navigate the process can make a significant difference in the outcome.

4. Oversharing on Social Media

Social media can be a minefield during a divorce. Avoid posting anything, or at least anything related to your case, as it can be used against you in court. Even seemingly innocent posts about your personal life can create complications and undermine your claims. As I often tell my clients: “There’s no productive reason to post anything about your divorce on social media.”

If you feel you need to post, stick to neutral content, like pictures of pets or meals. However, it’s best to limit your activity entirely to avoid misunderstandings or misinterpretations.

5. Leaving a Digital Trail of Poor Judgment

Anything you write—emails, texts, or social media posts—can create a digital record. Attorneys frequently use these records as evidence, so it’s critical to be mindful of your digital footprint.

For instance, I’ve seen cases where an individual wasn’t paying child support but posted about lavish vacations and expensive purchases. This digital evidence demonstrated a lack of financial responsibility and led to severe repercussions, including jail time.

6. Making Emotional Decisions

Throughout the divorce process, you will likely face triggering moments, but letting your emotions drive your decisions can be costly. Part of my role is guiding you through these tough times in a way that helps you avoid reacting impulsively to your spouse’s actions or refusing to compromise, knowing that emotional decisions often result in unnecessary conflict and higher legal fees.

Take time to process your feelings and work with a therapist to manage the emotional toll. Staying level-headed will help you focus on achieving a fair and practical resolution.

Final Word

Divorce is undoubtedly one of the toughest times in a person’s life. The way you navigate the process can make a significant difference in the outcome. By avoiding these common mistakes—such as dishonesty, impulsive decisions, or misusing social media—you can protect your interests and set yourself up for a smoother transition. Rely on your team of trusted professionals, follow their guidance, and focus on making informed, level-headed decisions.